DOWNING DELGADO & DODGING DEATH!

On my hike down memory lane, I stumbled across this gem………

Downing Delgado and Dodging Death!

Modern technology is amazing. Think about it, we have TV, telephones, face-time and Skype. We can actually see the person we are talking to, even if they are thousands of miles away. All a far cry from pigeon post or smoke signals.

 However, as great as it is, FaceTime can also become an instrument of exquisite mental torture, as I managed to prove one night when Skyping my son in London.

My daughter, Laura, had gone out for the night and left me alone with a bottle of Delgado and the TV remote. I decided to have a long-distance chat with Brent.

Lighting up a cigarette, and pouring a shot of Delgado, which, for the uninitiated, is a delicious coconut liqueur, I began chatting and drinking, and of course smoking.

Now remember my son is in London and can see everything that’s going on, but can do nothing about what he sees. So, he’s watching as I work my way through almost the entire bottle, by which time my cerebral messenger has kind of taken the night off.

Trying to light a cigarette, with fingers that for some reason have turned to spaghetti, I drop the lighter, fish around for a bit, can’t find it, so search instead for a box of matches.

Ha! Got one. Found a box. Now … trying this again.  Fumbling with drunk fingers I try lighting up again.  Dropping a few, some lit, some not, I finally have success with my smoke and continue chatting happily. 

Seeing Brent’s eyes widen as I burble on cheerfully, I just thought I was being particularly entertaining. Feeling all warm and fuzzy, I poured another shot or two. 

 What I did not realize, was the ‘warm’ part of ‘warm and fuzzy’ was from the fire I had started with the dropped matches, and the ‘fuzzy’ from the nearly empty bottle of Delgado.

I had set fire to the throw on the settee and Brent could see the flames building. He was trying to warn me, but, well, as I said, my cerebral messenger was vacationing at this point. 

Fortunately, Laura came home early for some reason, God probably tapped her on the shoulder and nodded in my direction. By coming home early she was just in time to see what was happening. She rushed in and very quickly put out the fire, saving the couch, the house and my life, not to mention Brent’s sanity.

Since that night I have stopped smoking… but still enjoy Delgado and face-timing Brent. And still thank God for His care.

 

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One thought on “DOWNING DELGADO & DODGING DEATH!

  1. Hilarious, since it seems you were unhurt. Glad you stopped smoking. Praise God, from whom all blessings flow.

    Like

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